Posted in The Lessons

Relationship 101: Have The Talk!

 

That’s why they call it “having a crush”, because when it’s going good or bad, it’s tearing you apart either way.

That’s why they call it “falling in love”, because it drags you down to a deep well. It forces you to be blind, not seeing the bads and the possible problems. It hurts when you love too much. It hurts when you feel less love.

 

I’m not saying that it’s a bad thing though… I believe that we can find at least 1 positive thing in every pain and sorrow. There’s a small hint of light in the darkness if you work on it.

Just a precaution: Keep your eagle eye and your sane mind to see what’s coming, to anticipate for the worst, to not let yourself going in too deep in the pool of feelings. Be realistic.

 

If you notice there’s an issue  in your relationship, don’t stay still: Speak up as soon as possible! Holding it up will do you no good, trust me. No matter how scary and terrifying you think the result will be, be bold, and start talking!

If you feel not ready for it, talk to your best friends, ask for their opinion, get some advice from other point of views. Let them encourage you and give you all the support you need.

I’ve had my part, and finally done it after 6 months of hesitating. The postpones were the painful parts. I promised myself not to regret anything in life, but these delays were something I regretted somehow. It should’ve been done earlier. I don’t want everyone else to experience the same as I did. That’s why I’m telling you this: When you feel it, let your feelings out. Give peace to your soul and mind, at least…

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Posted in The Lessons

Don’t Cheat!

To be honest, I’m not an expert on relationship. Yet, I have to admit (proudly, hahaha…) that I am not an amateur in solving relationship issues (especially when it’s other person’s issue *sigh).

As a start, I’ll let you know my relationship track record. It’s irrelevant actually, but well, I need to write something here, right? 😛

Up to now, I’ve been in 12 relationships plus 4 of no-relationship-but-you-are-basically-together-or-whatsoever-thingie. From those 16, I’ve experienced both cheating on and being cheated on. Aaaand… I hate to tell you this: Both are shitty!
Cheating on your BF/GF?

At the beginning, you can feel the rushing excitement. The fire is burniiiing! Yes! It’s addictively fun.

But… It’s not so fun after awhile. After you lose the sparks, you’ll get loose and careless. And voila! You get caught! What happen next?

1. Your BF/GF dumps you and treats you like a huge load of crap. You’ll suddenly notice the great moments you’ve had together. You’ll realize what a big lost you get. Aside from all of that, you’ll feel bad…

2. Your BF/GF forgives you and you’re back on track. One thing though… Your relationship would never be the same…
Being cheated on?

It’s not something I have to explain, isn’t it?

The realization of sharing your BF/GF with other person. The realization of his/her odd behavior. The thought that he/she does everything you’re through with other person. Argh!!!

Not to mention the broken self esteem… And all the echoing voices inside your head: “What did I do wrong?” “Am I ugly?” “Do I deserve to be loved?” “Am I worthy?”


So… Yeah…

Don’t cheat, babes! The idea is tempting. The opportunity (when it comes) is like the sun ray passing through the wall of clouds (I’m being serious here). But remember! If you are not ready for the consequences, KEEP YOUR LOYALTY TO THE MAX! 
Love,

Nee

Stay still, babes!

Posted in The Lessons

LAPAS Malang

Hello gorgeous,

Pas di Malang kemaren gw sempet mengunjungi salah satu Lembaga Permasyarakatan a.k.a. LAPAS Malang. Siapa yang lagi jadi napi di sana? Ra.ha.si.a! 😛

Jadi gw kesana semacam saltum (baca: salah kostum). Berhubung gw ke LAPAS setelah salam-salaman sebubarnya Sholat Ied, gw masih pake dress panjang, tanpa lengan. Dan gw berangkat ke LAPAS tanpa nyempetin ambil jaket ato apalah apalah.

Jadinya… pas udah nyampe sana, gw disuruh ganti baju! Dih! Lo kate rumah gw di sebelah LAPAS, dan gw bisa seenaknya capcus balik ke rumah buat ganti baju, gitu?

Jadi sejak detik itu, gw mah sebodo amat… kalo ga dibolehin masuk ya udah, gw tunggu di luar aja.

Akhirnya, sepupu gw inisiatif minjemin jaketnya buat gw pake. Walopun sempet kejadian juga gw dilarang masuk gegara pake jaket. Jaket juga dilarang, gals! Tapi pas gw tunjukin lengan telanjang yang ada di balik jaket, gw langsung dibolehin jalan terus. Wekekeke…

Eh eh ternyata di pos pemeriksaan yang kedua, gw dilarang masuk lagi gegara bawa tas. Padahal tas gw kecil loh! Cuman bisa muat dompet, amplop angpau, tisu, hape, ama tab. 😦

Akhirnya gw memutuskan untuk tinggal di luar aja, ga jadi besuk napi.

Rencana stay di luar pun gagal gegara rombongan gw menego para sipir biar gw bisa nyusul masuk. Alhasil, gw kudu nitip tas dulu di tempat penitipan yang ramenya naujubilah! Gimana ga rame? Orang yang antri kunjungan aja ampe 300an lebih dan 1 nomer antrian isinya bisa 3-8 orang!

Ujung-ujungnya gw berhasil masuk ke LAPAS, pake diraba-raba ama sipir cewek, buat pemeriksaan gitu… Yakalik gw bawa bom. Ato senjata tajam. Ato miras selundupan! Wekekeke…

Nah… berbekal keribetan kunjungan inilah, gw jadi terinspirasi buat nulis nih postingan. Biar bisa jadi tambahan info buat kalian yang suatu saat butuh ke LAPAS buat ketemu ama siapa gitu dehhh… Cus baca terus!

Tips
Berdoalah sebelum tidur… Wekekeke… Ga ada hubungannya ama LAPAS, tapi perlu dilakukan buat mempersiapkan hati dan pikiran. *halah

Pake celana yang nyaman n kaos yang ada lengennya.
Kunjungan hari raya kayaknya beda ama hari biasa. Soalnya para napi n pengunjungnya dikasih ruangan terbuka yang dikasih tikar ala-ala piknik keluarga. Makanya diminta pake baju yang sopan, biar ga ‘disergap’ ama napi lain – ini asumsi gw. Dan kenapa celana? Soalnya duduknya lesehan! Pake dress ato rok mah bikin ribet!

Pake sandal, jangan pake sepatu.
Ini kaitannya masih ama duduk lesehan tadi. Gw kemaren pake sneakers, jadi rombongan gw harus nungguin gw pake separu pas kita udah kelar kunjungan.

Siapin fotokopi KTP! Ini syarat wajib buat pengunjung. Kalo pengunjung cowok malah kudu bawa KTP asli (ato Kartu Pelajar dll.) buat pemeriksaan di dalem. Kuatirnya ada yang tukeran tempat ama si napi – semacam jadi joki gitu…

Tas, mau sekecil apapun, mending dititipin. HP wajib dititipin. Duit dikantongin aja, kali aja butuh…

Bawa snack ato minuman yang nggak mencurigakan. Yang masih segelan dalam kemasan, jadi ga bakal dicurigain bawa minuman aneh-aneh buat napi.
Snack bakal berguna pas lagi ketemuan ama si napi, jadi ngobrolnya lebih seru… kan ada cemilannya… Wekekeke…

Siapkan hati dan tisu yak. Kalo napinya orang yang deket ama kalian, gw yakin bakal ada acara nangis-nangisan. Jadi kalian harus jadi orang yang lebih kuat – jangan nangis bombai. Setidaknya kalo si napi nangis, kalian berada di posisi menenangkan, ga mewek-mewekan berdua. Wekekeke… Tisu juga penting buat menghapus air mata kesedihan… *halah lagi

Kalo bisa sih, sekalian kasih nasehat ke si napi buat ga ngulangin perbuatannya. Mana enak Lebaran gitu di bui, ga bisa jalan-jalan, ga bisa kumpul ama keluarga… Syedih lah…
Jaga juga orang-orang terdekat kalian biar ga sampe bikin salah atau ngelanggar hukum segitunya. Dipenjara tuh nggak enak…

Kira-kira gitu sih tips dari gw. Semoga bermanfaat yaaaa…

Posted in The Lessons

I’m an Ambivert!

Hello gorgeous!

I read a comic today about the life of an introvert. It was pretty interesting at the first place because I found my boyfriend to be one of this.

Then… I googled it, and found a quiz to find out whether I am an introvert or an extrovert person. And… it turned out that I am an ambivert!

Take a look on each of the category!

Ambivert
Being an ambivert means that you fall smack in the middle of the introvert-extrovert spectrum. In many ways, ambiverts have the best of both worlds, able to tap into the strengths of both introverts and extroverts as needed.

Introvert
Given the choice, introverts will devote their social energy to a small group of people they care about most, preferring a glass of wine with a close friend to a party full of strangers. Introverts think before they speak, have a more deliberate approach to risk, and enjoy solitude. They feel energized when focusing deeply on a subject or activity that really interests them. When they’re in overly stimulating environments (too loud, too crowded, etc.), they tend to feel overwhelmed. They seek out environments of peace, sanctuary, and beauty; they have an active inner life and are at their best when they tap into its riches.

Extrovert
Extroverts relish social life and are energized by interacting with friends and strangers alike. They’re typically assertive, go-getting, and able to seize the day. Extroverts are great at thinking on their feet; they’re relatively comfortable with conflict. Given the choice, extroverts usually prefer more stimulating environments that give them frequent opportunities to see and speak with others. When they’re in quiet environments, they’re prone to feeling bored and restless. They are actively engaged in the world around them and at their best when tapping into its energy.

[Credits to Quiet Revolution]

So… which one are you?

Posted in The Lessons

Naik Kereta Api, Tut Tut Tut~

Hello gorgeous…

Maap judulnya alay. Wekekeke…

OK, gw lagi excited banget, soalnya besok gw mudik! Dan, bener, gw berangkat dari Jogja (ke Malang instead of Jember) naik kereta api…

image

Jujur, gw sebenernya nggak terlalu suka naek kereta api, soalnya berisiknya bikin ga bisa tidur. Nah, kalo gw ga bisa tidur sepanjang perjalanan, gw bakal mati bosen selama 8 jam perjalanan.
Tapiiii… berhubung besok gw cabs ama adek gw, si Yuda, gw memutuskan buat naek kereta aja.

Kali ini, gw nyoba beli tiket kereta api secara online. Maklum… jadwal kerja gw padat merayap!!! *sombong dikit gapapa lah

Sampe sekarang, gw masih terkagum-kagum ama improvement PT KAI dalam hal layanan online. Suwkak! Praktis dah pokoknya!

Buat yang belom pernah beli tiket kereta api online, ikutin step by step di bawah ini yak… Enjoy!

1. Masuk ke situs resmi PT KAI (Di sini)
2. Pilih tanggal, asal, n tujuan keberangkatan
3. Pilih kereta api yang jadwalnya paling OK menurut kamu
4. Bayar tiketnya (Bisa pake ATM, internet banking, mobile banking, SMS banking, BCA KlikPay, …)
5. Tunggu email konfirmasi

Nah, kalo udah dapet email konfirmasi, kalian bakal dapet 1 file PDF yang isinya kode booking tiket n info penumpang yang kalian daftarin.

Di bagian keterangan tertulis bahwa kalian harus nunjukin print out dokumen ini untuk mendapatkan tiket, maksimal 1 jam sebelum keberangkatan. Tapi tapi tapiiii… ternyata ga perlu nge-print!

Langkah selanjutnya adalah:
1. Dateng ke stasiun kereta
2. Cari mesin printing boarding pass (kalo di Stasiun Tugu, adanya di area pintu masuk peron, di sebelah Indomaret)
3. Masukin kode booking ato scan QR code-nya
4. Klik “Cetak/Print”
5. Dapet deh boarding pass-nya!

image

Gampang banget dah pokoknya. Ga perlu antri customer service ato antri loket tiket. Cuman emang kalo semua orang mulai beralih ke tiket online, bakalan ngantri printing boarding pass nih…

Posted in The Lessons

Diet Kantong Plastik

Hello gorgeous,

Udah beberapa lama ini pemerintah Indonesia memberlakukan Diet Kantong Plastik. Praktiknya, setiap supermarket n minimarket membebankan biaya Rp 200 untuk 1 kantong plastik yang dipakai oleh pembelinya.

Menurut gw…
Kebijakan ini kurang bijak.

Kenapa?
Karena hanya membatasi dengan cara pemaksaan, tanpa memberikan solusi.

Fine, salah satu minimarket dan salah dua supermarket yang gw tau, udah memberikan alternatif lain: tas belanja yang bisa dipake berulang-ulang. Bentuknya semacam tote bag gitu. Bahkan di Superindo, udah dari sebelum era diet kantong plastik, disediain opsi lain untuk packing barang belanjaan konsumennya, yaitu kardus.

Apakah pemerintah – ato minimarket/supermarket – memberikan solusi?
Kayak yang gw bilang di atas… nggak semua minimarket ato supermarket memberi solusi.

Superindo: OK.
Gratis packing belanjaan pake kardus. Plus… jualan tas belanja yang bisa dipake berulang-ulang.

Mirota Kampus: OK
Sama kayak Superindo, MirKam nggak ngasih tambahan biaya kalo belanjaan kita di-pack pake kardus.
Setiap pembelanjaan minimal Rp 500.000, customer dapet tas belanja gratis – warna orens n bisa dipake berulang-ulang.

Indomaret: Zong!
Ga ada opsi lain yang ditawarkan.

Alfamart: Zong!
Ga ada opsi lain yang ditawarkan.

Swalayan Maga: Plastik gratiiiiissss…

Yang lain-lain belom sempet gw survey. Kalo sempet, gw cek toko-toko ritel se-Yogyakarta Raya buat ngecek kebijakan perplastikan. Wekekeke…

Apa yang terjadi saat Diet Kantong Plastik dicanangkan?
Konsumen tetep mbungkus belanjaannya pake kantong plastik. Alasannya? Karena “denda”-nya murah. Cuman Rp 200 ini…

Komen gw: Balik ke tujuan utama program Diet Kantong Plastik, yaitu mengurangi konsumsi kantong plastik. Big fail dong kalo masyarakatnya masih aja pake kantong plastik…

Kenapa kejadiannya gitu? Karena kebijakannya nggak matang! Ada isu, artinya ada solusi yang masuk akal n pake contingency plan.

Udah ah. Mau dengerin tukang ronda bangunin orang saur…

Posted in The Lessons

The “Ex”

All I want is nothing more
To hear you knocking at my door
‘Cause if I could see your face once more
I could die a happy man I’m sure

When you said your last goodbye
I died a little bit inside
I lay in tears in bed all night
Alone without you by my side

But if you loved me
Why’d you leave me?
Take my body
Take my body
All I want is,
And all I need is
To find somebody.
I’ll find somebody like you…

Oh oh…

So you brought out the best of me,
A part of me I’ve never seen.
You took my soul and wiped it clean.
Our love was made for movie screens.

But if you loved me
Why’d you leave me?
Take my body,
Take my body.
All I want is,
And all I need is
To find somebody.
I’ll find somebody.

Oh…

If you loved me
Why’d you leave me?
Take my body,
Take my body.
All I want is,
And all I need is
To find somebody.
I’ll find somebody like you…

Oh…

[All I Want by Kodaline]

———————-

An ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is a part of our past. Our past with them, either it was full of happiness or sadness, is still something precious. It doesn’t necessarily mean that the ex is still precious at the moment, but one thing for sure: the memories are worth keeping.

I believe that most of all had that one ex who torn our heart aparts real hard more than others when we broke up.
It was more than a sadness: it was a torture.
Well, breaking up was never a pleasure…
But keep in mind! Breaking up always came with a reason.
Either you were the one holding on the reason or your ex was.
So… You knew what would happen if the breaking up didn’t happen.

What about making up with the ex?
Back to be together as a couple, as a lover…
Is it a bad thing or a good one?

Well… You can never say whether it’s good or bad.
You know the risks, and it’s good, because you are aware of anticipation – how to make the things go well and how to make it go south.
You might go back to the bad situation which made you break up at the first place, and it’s bad. But again, you should’ve anticipated it from happening. And both of you should’ve learned from your past mistakes to fix it hand in hand or prevent it from happening.

What if being back with your ex didn’t give you any good?
You know the answer.
It’s either closing the book of your stories for real or keeping what you call relationship even though it hurts you more and more everyday – just throw away all your expectation to see him/her change into how you want him/her to be.

One thing to hold on tight: you are responsible of your own happiness.
If you are not happy, it’s mostly by your choice – and you’re the only one who has the power to change it.